I do normally look at it as a measure of how well I have taken care of my son...until now. For some reason, in looking towards the impending results of this blood test, I am seeing things very differently.
My son is now a teen. He will begin grade 10 in the fall. We have been working towards his own diabetes independence for years thanks to the amazing doctor who looked after him for the first 10 years after diagnosis. I still bolus when he hands me his pump. I still remind him to test and I hover over him threatening to insert a site in very uncomfortable spots when I know that he has gone days past a scheduled site change, but I am also allowing him to make a few of his own mistakes.
I thought about his basal patterns and realized that I am not making as many changes lately as I normally would have been. I am also not doing every part of his care. We have seen highs and have known that it was a bad site--No sense changing anything for that one. We have seen lows and known that it was that day of biking and then mowing the lawn that caused that one. Since he is going to be more active for the summer, that low warranted a change.
There have been more issues that have not warranted a change though. That is my point. We are looking at highs and the occasional low and going, "Oh yeah, that was a mistake here." or "Oh yeah, I guess there was more fat in that meal than expected." We (read that he) are learning.
|Thanks Reyna at Beta Buddies for the cool report card graphic!|
I have no idea what this A1c will look like. I expect it to be "okay". It will not be as low as Mom likes. It will be low enough for the diabetes team to go "oh wow! You are doing excellent." but personally they have pretty low standards. It will not be a double digit. It will most likely not even be overly high but it will be higher than I like (I am a seven person. I love to be under that 7% mentioned in the DCCT).
Call me in three months and this Zen moment will most likely be gone. I will be freaking out at the results. I will be hovering over my son more and telling him we have to get together a lot more on this but for today...I am good. Its a number. It just shows that we are learning and working towards my son taking over his disease with a large arsenal of skills one day in the near future.