Another Diabetes Blessing

Last night I rolled over in bed, put my arm near my face and went...YUCK!

My son had dropped insulin on my arm! I was laying in bed when I realized that we had forgotten to reset his basals back to "school days" after 10 days of Easter vacation. 

He made his way into my room with pump and site change gear in hand. I told him that I just needed his pump but he said that his alarm had gone off earlier so he might as well do both. 

Holy cow! Was it a full moon yesterday? It must have been because his site change alarm went off AND he changed it the same day??? This was beyond belief! We did the site change, fixed the pump and he was on his way but unknown to me, he had left me that present...a large drop of insulin.

After my initial "YUCK!"  I had to laugh to myself.  Before diabetes moved into our lives, that smell was reserved for the opening of a BandAide brand bandaid.  You knew that the cut was safe and sanitized. Now it evokes new images of syringes, cartridges and life saving liquid. 

The smell is still rather disgusting when it arrives in the form of a puddle on your arm as you are trying to fall asleep but without it...well its definitely a blessing more than anything else.

Keep Bleeding!

I heard the crash. I heard the intake of breath.  Something was wrong. 

I called out to the kitchen, asking my son if he was still alive. He was.  He had decided to cut his hand instead of a bun.  

I went into check on the level of damage. 

"Who knew that we had sharp knives!?" he exclaimed. 

The blood was flowing and I reminded him not to get it on the food. It would spoil the aesthetics if nothing else. At that point blood splattered on the top of the loaf.  I quickly told him "Don't clean up your finger yet. Keep it bleeding! I will be right back. When was the last time you tested yourself?" 

He told me it had been a bit.  I rushed into my youngest son's room and grabbed a meter. I brought it into the kitchen and applied the test strip to the decent sized pool of blood sitting on top of his finger. 

He was 5.6(100).  Life was good. Diabetes had not moved into his world.  I did a small happy dance and suggested that he might want to clean up the blood that was dripping off of his hand.  We went to the washroom, added the Scooby Doo Band aid and were good to go.  

To the casual observer, I am sure that experience would have seemed bizarre. For us, it was the norm.  We do not waste blood.  My oldest son knows this and knows that cleaning a cut only happens AFTER the blood has been tested. 

Okay it is a little warped but its what happens when diabetes has lived in your house for over 12 years! 

What didn't kill him made me stronger

A little over a month ago I came across an essay contest sponsored by a wonderful organization, The Diabetes Hope Foundation.  They are an amazing group based in Ontario started by a mother of three young men--two of whom has type 1 diabetes.  Her children have grown to be amazing men and her courage and dedication has never ceased to amaze me. 

I looked over the contest for a bit and asked my mom what she thought. Had diabetes really made "me" stronger?  I knew that if she could have reached through the phone she would have given me a large slap upside of the head so I figured it wouldn't hurt to enter the contest.  At stake was an IPod Touch and an IBGStar meter (I thought it was an iPad and was quite excited but I would not turn down an IPod either--actually my son won`t turn down the IPod!).  I sat down and attempted to write my story in a brief, 500 word essay. That was the biggest challenge of all! Finally, I pressed submit and asked my friends to vote on what I had written. I was 100 votes behind to start but my story was listed. I had a month to wait and see what would happen. 

Yesterday at the DHF's annual diabetes walk, the winner was announced. I am proud to share the winning essay with you...mine!

Diabetes barged into my life on a stormy day in March of 2000. Life was simple and each day was taken for granted until I heard the words...”If he lives past the next twelve hours we will teach you how to handle a child with diabetes.“ From that moment forward, I learned a lot about myself and my personal strength. I was terrified of taking my son home from the hospital. Could I handle making a toddler eat at specific times? Could I make him bleed numerous times per day? Could I stab him with a needle at least four times each day without him understanding why? Yes. I had no choice. I would force him to eat. I would mark his tiny body. The alternative had been shown to me in the ICU and it was not an option. I cried in frustration, alone in the dark. People told me I was stronger than I knew. I could do this. They were right. I did it and continue to do it. Diabetes is a constant struggle. No two days are the same. I constantly learn something new. I realized that not everyone was as strong as me. Not everyone to handle the challenges presented by diabetes and the rest of the world. I worked to change that. I gave comfort and educated people as often as I could. I changed laws. I shared information and offered support. Diabetes had stormed into my life but it gave me the strength to create real change. It made me realize that one person really can make a difference. It made me push my fears aside and turn emotion into powerful energy that propels me forward to keep fighting and to keep working to change the world for all people living with diabetes.

Thank you again to all of the amazing friends and family who supported me!! You are my rock and my strength. 

Isn't diabetes enough?

We see the eye doctor on a regular basis. Well we did until we moved. We had a fabulous, exceptionally thorough optometrist previously. Each year my son and I went to see her. I went because I am blind as a bat and too chicken to see about laser treatment and my son went in order to keep on top of possible diabetes complications. 

I knew eventually we would need to find a new eye person and we did.  My son's diabetes clinic set us up with a pediatric opthamologist.  Today was the appointment.  I expected it to be short. The sign said to expect 1-2 hour appointment length or more if you were a new patient.  Holy crap! We were going to have to camp out and I didn't have a book to read! 

Our appointment was at 8:30am.  The doctor was late.  We finally got into the office and the exam began. My son did poorly. He had trouble with the largest of print.  Things were not looking good. Part way through he pulled out his glucometer.  Crap (again!).  Highs (or lows) would impair his vision.  He had been high the day before after breakfast.  How the heck were we going to know if he needed glasses or not? He was high.  How do you schedule an appointment for when your bg levels are perfect?? Diabetes ruins everything.

I had not really thought about diabetes messing with an eye exam before.  My kids did not inherit my poor eyesight and I never think of something else being wrong. In my mind, the opthamologist was about diabetes not eye sight. There had been close calls before--"we will watch this but he will probably need glasses later."  but they had never amounted to anything.  Was today going to be different? 

My son had his eyes dilated, she re-examined him and decided that he would see for another day.  His eyes are not 20/20. They are a little bit worse but not enough to worry about.  She left it up to us to discuss and decide what to do.  I asked if getting glasses now would prevent further deterioration of his eyes.  She said no. 

As we got into the car at the end of the appointment, I asked my son what he thought. He said that there was NO way he was having glasses, contacts or anything else.  He could see. He could see the writing at school. They had said before that he may need glasses but his eyes were better at the next appointment. Today was no different. He would not need glasses. He had diabetes. One thing in life was plenty. 

Well, I asked didn't I?  I agreed that we would wait and see how things went. If he felt he couldn't see, he was having problems at school or next year she said things were worse--glasses it would be. He was right though--shouldn't one health issue be enough for any person?      

Uncharted Territory

I was recently going through my son's pump and stopped in shock.  I was struck by how much things have changed since he first began pumping. 


When my son first got a pump, we needed to have the ability to use very small basal rates. Despite having a 300 unit cartridge, we would only fill it to 200 units and still have to throw some out after one week. 


His carb to insulin ratios were of course much different and his basal rates were never close to 1 unit per hour.  


Over the years, I have gotten used to some of those changes. I learned that sweeping changes would no longer kill him. Puberty was turning his insulin to water and my brain was on overload. 


The one thing I never expected however was the importance of the midnight carb to insulin ratio.  My son didn't eat that late.  On a really special night of roasted marshmallows he might eat at 10pm but we didn't need to worry about anything after that.  The ratio set after midnight was just to satisfy the pump.  It had no real significance...until now.


Now that carb to insulin rate is just as important and used as often (or more) than breakfast! He often finds himself creeping the halls late at night searching to see what goodies are hidden in the fridge.  


It took me a bit to realize this. At first I thought, oh he needs his overnight basal rates tweaked. I began to look much more closely at my son's eating habits. There were boluses at midnight and one in the morning! This time now mattered.  I had to make changes and pay close attention.  What had happened?

Oh yeah...I have a teen son! What was I thinking?

One Great Thing

What is the one thing that I do really well when it comes to diabetes? I think it has to be my ability to be a Continuous Glucose Monitoring Mom during the night. We do not have a CGM.  We do not have a My Sentry or a D.A.D.  We simply have a sleep deprived Mom and some serious guardian angels who like to kick her butt.

For years I would set an alarm clock for 3am.  I would then wake at 2am and find my son was running a little high. I would correct and sleep for another two hours. 

I would go out at night, come home and test my son only to have him sit up in bed in a zombie like state with a blood glucose reading that barely registered on his meter. Somehow I just knew to test before I did anything else.

I can go to sleep, be sound a sleep and something will wake me. I will need to use the washroom. I will have a dream of my phone ringing. I will be sound asleep, dying to stay right where I am and "something" will make me get myself out of bed.  I will stumble to my son's room and be instantly alert when I realized that his blood glucose is low...and dropping.

I am sure that a CGM would say that I was fallable and it could do better, but I have heard that it makes mistakes too. So far, knock on wood, I have never slept through a low that caused a seizure.  My son has woken up every morning. He will ocassionally wake to his highs and has woken to one low in over 12 years.  Thankfully the Momma Monitor has only slept through the night a hand full of times. I may not get the readings right before bed. I may not bolus properly all of the time or gage the influence of activity exactly right but so far I have been able to protect my son at night, protect his body, and keep his A1c down to an acceptable range. I think that counts as "one great thing".